Chapter 35: Realizations
Her scent was old but thick in the air. It filled him and made him long for her all the moment; to go, to find her and hold her to him forever more. It killed him that she had been within his reach for two years yet he hadn’t been able to find her.
He cursed his brother to hell as he walked to the cave. It was so thick with her scent even though it was old; he saw how she had lived in that cave. It looked as if it had been made for a lord to hide out of until it was safe. It was clear that Sesshomaru had cared for her comfort but it only served to sicken Inuyasha. Kagome must have been confined to the cave but the…bed held her the most.
Sesshomaru’s scent was all over it as well.
But still Inuyasha was incapable of stopping himself from throwing himself onto the bed and crying in outrage of what had likely taken please in the bedding.
She hadn’t deserved it. She hadn’t deserved anything that his brother had done to her and yet, Inuyasha knew that she had been taken by force again and again by his brother. The faint scent of sex slowly filled the air from his falling upon the bed told him so.
He leap away from the foul scent but still the scent of Sesshomaru and Kagome mixing together filled his nose. The scent filled his mind with the two of them in the bed together; Kagome struggling and crying as Sesshomaru touched her and filled her.
He turned away, hoping for mercy of the two fading from his mind but it only intensified before his eyes. He didn’t want to see her naked body beautiful and pure touched by Sesshomaru’s hands and naked flesh. He turned to the rock wall on the cave and slammed his head against, hoping to get the foul images out of his mind but they only became sharper, clearer until it was all that he could see.
Inuyasha turned to the entrance and ran. He just ran and ran, unable to look back for he knew that scent, and the images were fast on his tail. They would continue to chase him until he found her.
oOo
“What is that, sweet girl? Is it a flower?” Kagome asked Mizuki as her daughter patted the yellow bloom before jumping up and down with excitement and running away to another part of the garden.
Kagome could help but feel the excitement that her daughter gave at the new experience, even though her baby had done the same thing with other flowers. It filled her with a sense of peace that she was so often missing. A sense of peace only her children gave her.
She smiled down at Yumi, who was sleeping so peacefully in her arms. It hurt just a little when she looked at her daughter’s ears. They made her look so like her uncle but she acknowledged that she would never have a future with Inuyasha but then did she want a future with any man? She had her children and that was all she wanted.
She wanted nothing more but then now. She would work to rebuild a relationship with Sesshomaru but the thought of being touched by him was one that she was not sure that she would ever be okay with after everything that had happened between them. Kagome just hoped that they could be friends and raise their children together. But she knew he wanted more from her.
She didn’t know if she should hope for their last resort or not.
“Hello Mizuki.” Kagome looked at the stranger kneeing beside her daughter.
Resisting the urge to get between the two, Kagome covered Yumi’s head and face before giving into the urge at a breakneck pace.
“Who are you?” She demanded as she kept Mizuki behind her.
The stranger stood to his full height and bowed to her. He looked a great deal like Hotaka only with Hotaka’s mate’s hair. He was dressed simply though and she was unsure what to think of the demon before her.
“I am the third son of the hell lord, Hotaka and his lady mate, Rie. My name is Saburo.” He informed her with a gentle tone of voice.
But it did not give Kagome any sense of comfort to know that he was Hotaka’s son. Though, she was beginning to talk with him, it did not meant that it was safe to tell him everything. It felt almost like everyone was an enemy but then that would make her hypocritical in the end since she herself had called Sesshomaru paranoid when they had last talked about this.
“I am Kagome…what do you want? How do you know my daughter?”
“My mother has talked about her a few months ago. Wouldn’t stop going on about how cute your daughter was and then began to lecture me and my older brothers about now giving her grandchildren.” He said to her sheepishly. “As to what I want? I can’t wait to join the battlefield, I just love a good fight.”
“I see…well, it was nice meeting you, Saburo but we should be going now.” Kagome informed before picking up a wiggling Mizuki and take her children inside.
Mizuki screeched in protest and it broke Kagome’s heart to know that her daughter wanted to continue to play but she felt it wasn’t safe for them. So she ignored her desire to give into what her little girl wanted and took the three of them back inside.
But her little girl was stubborn just like her uncle and tried to get pass her to return to the garden. Kagome closed the door before Mizuki could make it though, to which her little girl burst out into tears in protest of the ending of her fun. She felt like such a bad mother for forcing her daughter to stop her play outside but she truly did not feel it was safe for her children to be around the stranger.
Maybe Sesshomaru wasn’t the only one that was paranoid. Maybe everything that happened for the last two years were beginning to do the same to her but then could she really blame herself?
All seven of her children had been by the demon that had raped her for over two years. A demon she was still living with; a demon that would have to give her over to others that would do the same if he didn’t go to war to keep her for himself. Was her life really going to change, though? What would stop Sesshomaru from keeping her all for himself after the war? Wasn’t she just thinking of keeping a relationship with him, of trying to be friends with him for the sake of their children?
Gods, she was so naive. He had removed the armguards but she hasn’t used her own powers in so long. Was she even capable of using them anymore? Even so would she be able to fight; what would stop Sesshomaru from putting them back on her if she displeased him?
Mizuki’s crying became even loader and soon Yumi joined her oldest sister in crying. Kagome was forced from her thoughts to try and sooth her children but still they continued to cry. Nothing had worked and it only made Kagome feel all the worst as a mother.
She was meant to be stronger and better for her children but she was just becoming a burden for all of them.
Tears came to her eyes at the thought. She had wanted to be everything that they needed but she wasn’t and couldn’t be that. She couldn’t be like her mother in the end.
Why did she keep living? She couldn’t be like her mother, she couldn’t be the good mother that her children needed but she could not deny that Sesshomaru was an excellent father to their children. Would her children do better without her in their lives? Would they thrive under the loving care of one parent as she and her brother had?
She knew that she and her brother had thrived in their mother’s loving care; how she wished that she was like her mother but she wasn’t. She was broken and crippled by all that had happened to her like a beautiful china bowl dropped, and shattered beyond repair. Her children needed someone whole.
A sob ripped free of her as she thought of the hopeless of everything. She wanted to give her children the lives that they deserved but could she? Her time would never accept Yumi or would think her a freak along with her other children.
But the demons of this time would forever be trying to use her daughters and kill her sons. With their father, they all had a chance to live a life here though. That was something that she would make sure of.
The least she could do for her children, her babies was to make sure that they would survived whatever this coming war would throw at them. She would do that and then she would consider doing the unforgivable.
Her own tears had calmed the tears of her daughters and Kagome smiled sadly at them both. The concern in Mizuki’s eyes made her wish that she was the mother that they deserved. But she knew that she wasn’t, and only hoped that Sesshomaru would one day find the demoness or human that would be everything that their children needed in a mother.
It was best to enjoy the time she had left with her children and end everything when it was time to do so.
oOo
Rie smiled happily when she saw her son in the garden and did not think twice about running to him. He took her into his arms, giving her a strong hug that a son would give his mother. It was a moment before her son let her go and allow her to take a step back.
It was so hard at times for her to believe that the strong male before her had once been tiny enough to have been inside of her. It filled her with such pride to see him as such a strong male like his father. The only failing point she could ever find with an of her kids were the lack of grandchildren being made.
“How is home?” She questioned.
“It’s good, some of the girls are making eyes at males in court but girls will be girls.” Saburo informed her.
“At least some of my children are working to give me grandchildren.”
Saburo looked disturbed at her words but then he had always done that when she mentioned in any way that he should be giving her grandchildren. But he got the same look on his face when she informed her already huge brood of children that another would be born into their ranks as well.
“I think they are just more interested in having a good time with good looking males, mother. I mean, we’re all still rather young-”
“You’re almost two thousand years old, Saburo. You’re my third baby boy and yet, I have hear not even a whisper of any of your playthings falling pregnant with my grandchild.” She snarled at her son. “Some are questioning if our bloodline is cursed because of my mother…it’s because of her that all the demons of the human realm have such trouble having children.”
“Ignore them, mother. They know nothing! My grandparents had a love that not even the gods could understand.”
Rie could not agree more with her son. Her parents had been amazing and wonderful from the first moment to the last. Being in love as she was, Rie could understand why her mother had ended her life as she had instead of enduring life without her mate.
The only thing that would stay her own hand if she lost Hotaka would be if their baby grew inside her like her mother before her. Her kids were symbols of her and Hotaka’s love just as she was a symbol of the love her parents had shared in their life together. She was thankful that she had been given such a long time with the male that she loved.
“I still want grandchildren soon.” She suddenly demanded of her son.
She wanted the symbols of her love to make their own symbols before she turned to dust from old age after all.
“Well, if Mizuki’s mother is willing then I wouldn’t mind have a few children with her.”
She could barely keep the shock from her face at her son’s words but when it wore off, she was quick to slap the back of his head for the cheek. “Kagome is off limits to you. She belongs to Sesshomaru for now.”
“For now?”
She stared at Saburo, wondering why he was so curious about Sesshomaru’s concubine. He rarely had shown such interest in females before. He preferred to be with handsome and rugged males like his playthings in his harem where he loved to play sword to their sheaths.
“There are some concerns about her care under Sesshomaru and Nori. Your father and I may have to remove her and her children if it is true that she has been abused.” Rie said quietly before adding. “Since when have you had any interest in females…should I remove the males in your harem and replace them with females of good breeding?”
“I think it’s true.” He muttered before growling at her. “No taking my males! I have a new virgin that needs to be broken in when the war is done…And I’m looking forward to breaking him in.”
“I hope you intend to make this one conceive your child then and what do you mean it is true? Have you seen Sesshomaru do anything unkind to her?!” Rie demanded the last part.
Her heart was breaking at the thought of Nori having truly been unkind to the human woman. But she knew her friend was capable of anything now for her family, which sickened her more than she had ever been before. Humans were both cruel and kind creatures that did not know anything in the grand scheme of things. They were just children; which was why it made her feel so sick knowing that her best friend would abuse one.
“Maybe, I mean to take my time with this one and get him to be comfortable with his new role in life.”
“New role? You make it sound like this male would find himself being taken as a forbidden thing like a human.”
“That’s because he is a human, mother.” He said to her.
Causing her to become shocked once more, her sons had never shown any interest in humans before and really, only her baby brother even liked to come to the human realm. It caused her to become lost her thoughts of Sesshomaru and Kagome, and to focus completely on this new aspect of her son’s life.
“A human? Tell me how you both met and have you had him prepared with the necessary spells? Should I go home and do the spells on him for you?” She questioned her son, who was starting to look uncomfortable.
“The necessary spells for him to live in hell have been done but do you really think I would be standing here in front of you if I had the other ones done on him? Gods, the thought of him in heat and begging would undo me.” He muttered and Rie noticed the large tent that appeared on her son’s sashinuki hakama.
“He must be something special if you become hard as stone at the thought of him begging you to take him like a female in heat.”
Saburo blushed at her words and followed to where her eyes lead her. The blush on his cheeks turned even redder as he covered himself with his hands. It was clear that he had forgotten that she had already seen him in action both with hand and with a partner. She remembered though how her own mother had blushed deeply as she watched the same once upon a time.
“Stop looking at it, mother.”
“Why? I have seen you perform with your cock before, son so there is nothing to be embarrassed by it.” She stated in fact. “Besides, you will be using your cock to make me grandchildren with this human male…I’ll have to tell Goro to talk with you and your human after you impregnate him.”
“Why? Please tell me that you and uncle Goro won’t be watching?!” There was a panicky tone to his words that had her looking away from the tent to look her son in the eye.
“I’m assuming this human is not a priest so that means that you will be having half demons with him and Goro will be useful in helping train them for battle…and of course, I’m going to watch! I want to see you in action as you make my future grandchild!”
Her words had Saburo groaning and the tent went down rather fast as well.
“It is normal for a mother to want to watch her son perform in love making to give her a grandchild, Saburo. All my friends have said it was a delight to see their first grandchildren conceived. Do you wish to let me suffer by denying me the opportunity to watch you thrust roughly into this human male?”
“Ugh, mother! I beg mercy from you; I do not want you to watch me make my children! Do that to my sisters or my brother please but not me! Spare me!” Saburo pleaded.
It reminded her of how he would beg for sweets as a child. She ignored his pleading just as she ignored his begging when he had been a child. It was common for a mother from hell to watch her child make their first child with their mates. She planned to do it with all her children just like her friends had with their own children.
“I plan to do it with them as well. I plan to watch you and all of your siblings make their firstborns…oh stop, you’ll be doing the same one day when you’re a parent too.”
Her son looked so sick from what she had said but she knew that it was just because he was not a parent yet. After all, what parent did not want to make sure their children were doing everything right when it came to making the next generation in their family.
That was what made her realize that Nori had done just that. Her best friend had done everything to make sure that the next generation of her family had been born. Though Rie would never force her children to be with partners that they did not want to be with; she knew that Nori would.
Sesshomaru was Nori’s only living child and was one of a small handful of members of her family. To Nori, family was everything. It left a bittersweet taste in her mouth and only made it all the clearer that she would have to step in with Hotaka for Kagome’s sake.
Looking at her son, Rie hugged him once more and whispered in his ear. “Thank you, sweetheart.”