He stopped breathing. I felt his last under my hand and I cried for it.
I knew it needed to be done. That age tortured him and was cruel to him.
I loved him and cared for him yet I wish I died with him. I want him back, I need him to heal the pain.
The house is too quiet without him near me, loving me. I feel so alone and it hurts to breathe.
He was my hope, my love, my dream. I held him as the needle went in and as the drug filled him.
I wish he had fought me, bite me and make me bleed. It would hurt less than the loss of him.
I am alone without him in my life. My chest hollowed out and a smile painted on my face.
I don’t want to be strong when all I want is him.
I lost the best part of me for his own sake. His mind broken into pieces as memory erode.
It was a mercy as much as a cruelty.
He loved me, trusted me, wanted the pain of his mind to end. So I did.
I took his trust, his love and gave him the relief needed. My boy will sleep, never to breathe again.
But as his suffering has come to an end.
Mine has just begun.

This is a poem about my dog’s last moments. He was put Nov 15 and it hurts but it needed to be done. His mind was going, he couldn’t even remember me some mornings and he was scared.

I loved him with my whole heart and it feels like I’m dying now that he’s gone. It was the same with my first dog. She was so beautiful and so was he. I have been both blessed and cursed to have amazing dogs in my life.

I wrote this because writing has always helped me. So I wrote my pain. I love him and I wanted to share the peace that I gave him in the end.